Friday, April 25, 2008

'til death do us part.

Those are some strong words. I think our society hears that phrase so much, that few people really think about them before they say them, and most of the time when it comes for a couple to break, they regret saying it in the first place.
I was watching a movie a few weeks ago...who knows what movie it was, there was a wedding scene. I think I was having one of those days where I was uber emotional and the newly weds-to be said this and I kinda got a little choked up. Not that I haven't said it already, those are some strong words; to say to another human being, to say in front of your family and friends and most importantly, under a vow of God.
Maybe I'm just a little too much of a realist, but to me, those words are literal. Only death is to separate you and your spouse. That means amongst the fights, the bickering and just the plain sick of each other. And of course, everyone knows most relationships endure their appropriate amount of disagreements. But "until death do us part" also encompasses...the sicknesses, the money problems and even the infidelity. And by committing to that, you're committing to being there all the way.
I know this is kinda impractical when you look at it, but last night on Grey's' Anatomy, this guy married his love interest after only 10 days. The woman was estatic because he was gorgeous, rich and caring, while she on the other hand was a "trashy waitress." To make a long story short, it turns out that the man had a brain tumor which prompted him to make quick decisions...in which marrying the woman at the spur of the moment was a prime example. What would you do if your husband married you by accident?
Remember Terry (whatever her last name??!) who was a paralyzed vegetable in the hospital for over 8 years? Her husband fought and fought to get her life support shut down so she could just die. What do you do when your husband is terminally ill and he can no longer function or he is in miserable pain? Does "'til death do us part" still matter?
And possibly the worst of them all: What if your spouse cheats on you? Or what if you just...fall outta love?
It's no secret that our society has fallen off when it comes to values. That is...American society, at least. The current rate for divorce is 50%. That means either your or your best friend's marriage will not last.
I'll only be 19 next week and I know right now marriage seems far in the distance, and when I've previously given thought to marriage...it scares me. Marriage does some blissful, but I've never thought marriage as something carefree and easy. I know I wouldn't even think about marrying someone whom I wasn't disgustingly obsessively over the top heels everything in love with, but just thinking about committing my entire life to someone is a serious commitment.

Could you say those words to someone and really mean it?

one day i will.

just a thought. have a great weekend.

8 comments:

1/3 of what I used to be said...

I think its possible. If you and your spouse have the same objectives in mind when getting married and both have a strong relationship with God I believe you can make it last. But that cheating thing...yea that would be the only thing that would make me leave..vows were broken so essentially so is the marriage..

Iunno i just know I will be the person who gives my all. so its possible..

I hope you have a great weekend:-)

dessex said...

i watched that Grey's last night (one of my favorite shows) and it had me thinkin as well. Till death to us part is a strong statement

Jadore.Tokeyo said...

those are some very strong words, that's why i don't plan on getting married soon, or until i know that it's right. when i get married i only want to do it once.

karrie b. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
karrie b. said...

i must be smokin somethin cuz i posted a comment here for that was meant for someone elses post.

but yeah, i think i wanna get married, even tho the constitution of marriage is f*cked up, i think i'd do everything to make mine work.

-KB

Adrianne M said...

1/3-->Yea, you definitely have to have the same objectives in mine...only necessary. But, it's possible. Enjoy your weekend too :)

Dessex--> Yay for Grey's!!!

I<3Tokyo--> Yea, I can't imagine what it's like getting married more than once!!

KB--> Yea, i actually saw the post you made. I was like whatt?!!? lol Rasta?!
Your wedding is probably gonna be FAB.

Eb the Celeb said...

I dont know if I could and really mean it... but I hope to be able to feel that way one day.

brran1 said...

*Coming thru from 1/3's*

I think a major reason why relationships in general don't work is because of a lack of communication. If communication is kept up then somethings will be fixed before given the chance to fester.